Hey guys.
I haven't posted on my blog for a while; and in all honesty, I kinda fell out of love with it. The constant need to be on social media took a hold of me, and I would get annoyed with myself if I wasn't posting on Instagram or Twitter daily. I know this sounds ridiculous, but it seemed to be the only way I could get my posts read. Which is exactly what the issue was.
I started writing this blog as an outlet, somewhere I could just write about anything and everything. But the amount of views started to take over, and it made my blog become a chore as I was constantly posting on social media about my posts. Don't get me wrong, that's absolutely fine, and I don't see anything wrong with it. But it got to the point where I would check my stats quite a lot, and would feel disheartened if a post I had put loads of effort into had hardly been read. This was supposed to be a hobby, something that I would do for myself. I don't know, I guess I just started thinking, what was the point?
I'm now in my fourth and final year of university, and even though I'm excited to see what happens in the future, I can't help but think; what the hell am I going to do next year? I have spent my whole life in education, which is mad if you think about it. I actually remember talking to a friend at school in 2012 when the world was supposedly going to end (lol) and saying how if it did end, we would have spent our whole lives in education. I can remember thinking, with all of my teenage angst and hatred for the education system (again, lol, who did I think I was?), I wish I could grow older and get a job and be one of those women who has their lives together. I can actually remember wishing I was 21.
Well, Grace mate, I can assure you that you do not have your life together at 21. I'm sat here thinking what would I like for dinner? And the fact that I've got food in feels organised to me. Yep, that's the extent of my organisation. Well, not really, I'm actually on top of my work (for once) and seem to have an idea of what I want to do after graduation. However, even though I'm so set on this goal, the thought of it terrifies me. What if it doesn't pan out? Where am I going to live? As you can tell, I'm basically having an existential crisis.
But the one thing I'm sure of is this. I am so bloody proud of my blog. It's mine, I created it, I can write whatever the hell I want and it's just fab. It's somewhere I can talk about stuff like my existential crisis at the age of 21, and then hopefully look back in 10 years and think wow, I really needed to stop being such a drama queen. Hopefully. Or maybe I'll still be a drama queen in 10 years. Well, let's hope I'm a drama queen with a job.
But I think the point of this post is that I feel like I need my blog. I need somewhere to vent my thoughts. And you know what, even if I don't get the numbers that I want, I'm still going to write. Even if it is just for me, because I bloody love it. So there you go, moral of the post - do what you love, and don't let anything get in the way of it. Because I stupidly started to think it was about numbers, but it's not. I really do appreciate everyone who reads my blog, and I really do mean that. But I think I had it in my head that it would be easy to get yourself out there. But I can assure you that it is not, and hats off to anyone who is a blogger, because it is hard work.
Anyway, that's all I wanted to say. I will be back with a post in the near future, and will not leave it another 5 months (oops). But yeah, welcome to Love, Ellena Grace 2.0. Expect a bit of beauty, a bit of lifestyle, a bit of travel, and a hint of Grace's good old rambles.
Thanks for reading, and lots of love,
Grace x
